Progress Update
Ryland has been adjusting ridiculously well so far...or so we think! He's taken to our family right away and loves them like his own. He asks for each of them by names throughout the day and gives big hugs/kisses when we see them without prompting. Grandpa and Aunt Chandler watched him for a few hours so I could get my hair done and he was fine - no problems, no tears, no asking for mama or papa...SUCCESS!!!
Since we have a pool, we wanted to get him in swimming lessons pretty quickly so that he could at least learn the basics. He's having a blast and loves to go to "swim school" every night! The teachers say that they can communicate with him just fine and if he looks confused, they just show him what to do. Today they asked "Who wants to jump in first?" and Ry was like "ME, ME"!
I know that he doesn't comprehend most of what is going on, but he gets pieces of it and understands more everyday. Everywhere we go, he asks if it is America too. I think he thought that was the name of our house!! He is still amazed by airplanes, cars, limos, trucks, trains and points every single one out!!
Our biggest struggles right now are discipline, food & playing on his own. He likes to pout when he doesn't get his way and we are still working out our boundaries. Food-wise, he tries everything, but isn't too keen on American food yet but he is getting there! He wants someone to play with him all of the time and doesn't grasp the concept of all the millions of little things there are to do each day. He gets a little better each day, but it is something that we're working through. The last struggle is no naps...that equals no "time" during the day to get anything done. He goes non-stop from the time he gets up!
He has SOOO much to adjust to and I am sure it's overwhelming! The part we didn't prepare for is how overwhelming being parents actually is. As happy as I am, there are times throughout each day that I grieve for my old life. I guess I need a transition period, too! As I was getting ready the other morning, I looked at my bathtub in my bathroom and just missed it so much. It used to be clean, inviting, relaxing and bottles of potions/bubble bath were all around it. That morning all of the bath toys from the night before were scattered in the tub and wash cloths were everywhere. My potions and pretty towels had been moved to the side, replaced with bright colored monkey towels...I missed my bathtub. As I am sitting there, thinking of my old bathtub, Ry comes barrelling in with a big smile saying "Mama, beautiful"! Perfect timing...I snapped out of it...bathtubs are over-rated anyways. I can guarantee you that he has had more fun in that tub in a week than I have had in it in 3 years!!
Love,
Cort
A boy & his dog! Don't let Sadie's look fool you, she is loving all the extra treats that Ryland happens to give her!
posted by The Stone's @ 10:09 PM
3 Comments
3 Comments:
I remember finding it shocking that when we got home I was sad and missing my old life after all the work we did to bring E home. You will adjust but it takes a while to get used to the new normal. Just know that what you are going through is normal.
Wonderful update. It has got to be hard to become instant parents to an older child, it's hard that you missed out on his beginning. At the beginning, Nicholas required 24 hour supervision and also took no naps. Day by day it got better though. Ry is older and will catch up faster, he seems very bright. I also grieved for a long time what our life was like before, it was so much easier, even with 2 kids. But now, I can't imagine our life without him, it is so much richer.
Everything you are experiencing is completely normal. We also experienced our first child as an older. We were all prepared for the baby....crib and all...and then we journeyed home with a 3 year old. I think the hardest part to explain to others was that we were "new" and in shock parents who did not get to lay next to the little blob in the blanket and coo and giggle. Ours hit the floor running every (very early) AM and if allowed would swing from the curtains (well, actually he did this in the kaz apt...ha!) and going and demanding 24/7. It was sooo exhausting! The constant playmate was what killed me at first too. I had been a career woman for a long time (even a short stint as a nanny) and I was not prepared for playing and interacting constantly. Take Breaks, make sure you have a date night, and even if he doesn't nap, start a Ry quiet time in his room....set the timer or something. Trust me, his overstimulated brain needs it too.
You guys are doing a great job and he looks so happy and everyone will keep adjusting fine...just be patient with him and yourself. Keep a schedule, be very consistent with discipline and keep things calm at home. You will find that they thrive with a bit of structure along with the other fun stuff! Love the new blog, will follow along and hopefully meet up in Dec when we come for a Christmas visit to my family! :)
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